Moving to China or taking up a new job in Asia could be an expat’s dream. With attractive packages to work in established companies, a booming economy and a fascinating culture, China has much to offer those seeking a new life abroad. Once there, it can be easy to fall into a trap of comfort and security within the expat bubble, not knowing that you may inadvertently be causing problems for yourself.
With a culture that can be entirely opposite to your own, watch out for these mistakes that could sour your introduction into your new exciting life in a rich and vibrant country.
Miscommunication in China
Employing some common sense in China goes a long way, but you need to keep in mind that certain topics are off limits. Topics that we normally discuss with ease at home with our family and friends, and work colleagues, can be entirely taboo in China. You must tread carefully around politics, especially considering the fragile global political climate of today. Discussions around money and wealth are also best avoided- naturally during business negotiations this will be necessary, but don't brag or demonstrate your personal wealth or financial acheivements.
One of the most notable is the tricky, volatile, and extremely controversial relationship between China and Japan, under no circumstances must you compare China with Japan as this can cause deep offence to your Chinese colleagues, and is simply insensitive and, well basically, rude. The same goes for Chinese historical or political matters; this can be a treacherous subject and is better left out of a conversation.
Another less obvious taboo is the issue of death; Chinese culture is extremely superstitious, and death is something that is not discussed openly; and the colour white is associated with death, much like black signifies mourning and death in other countries, so avoid presenting your Chinese friends with gifts in the colour white.
The giving of gifts
Gifts themselves often present challenges to expats in China. Whilst we are accustomed to giving gifts at birthdays and Christmas, in China offering gifts can be successful in breaking the ice and building interpersonal relations. If you are invited to stay with a Chinese family, it is entirely appropriate to offer a gift. Travelling for business may also mean that you might want to offer a gift to your co-workers when you arrive. These presents may be refused at first, due to the desire to show humility and avoid the appearance of greed. However, it is equally ill mannered to refuse a gift, so continue to offer and it will be accepted. It is commonly accepted that you should avoid offering flowers to your Chinese hosts. Many types of flowers are believed to bring bad luck, and certain colours should also be avoided, depending on the region. The same goes for numbers and you should avoid the number four at all costs. This is also associated with death, as the Chinese word for ‘four’ sounds like the same word for death. On the other hand, eight is extremely lucky.
Paying in China
Paying is also a complicated area to navigate in China. To begin with, if you are invited to lunch or dinner, it is expected that the eldest or most senior of the group is the host and will pay for those invited. Bills are not normally shared, and it is a grave offence to offer to pay for your share of the bill. The exception to this is if you have invited your guests, whereby the same rules will apply. You will be expected to pay for yourself and your invitees. In the West, we are largely used to tipping quite heavily for certain services, especially in restaurants. In China, this is a practice that is generally not observed so at the end of a meal, you will not be expected to leave any money. However, if you have a private guide or driver, you may want to tip them as this will form part of their salary, as it does in many other countries.
Losing face
The concept of ‘losing face’ is extremely important in China, or rather the art of not losing face. So what exactly is it? Essentially it is the practice of giving respect where due and not causing any embarassment to the other person. This is one of the most important rules within Chinese society and must be abided at all times. For example, if you decide to buy gifts for people in your department, you must buy something far more valuable for senior members. To receive the same gift as everyone else will result in ‘losing face’ and great embarassment for all. The same goes for the way we speak to each other and verbally interact, in a Western business environment it might not be unusual to see someone lose their temper in the office or shout at a colleague.We are quite used to having disagreements or social frictions on a daily basis, whether it is about receiving the correct change in a shop, complaining about poor service, or someone cutting you up in traffic. Yet in China, to directly shout at someone in front of others results in both people ‘losing face’. This is really unnacceptable in Chinese culture and must be avoided at all costs, no matter how frustrated you may be! In the same vein, you must address people by their proper title; in Europe particularly, it is considered quite usual to call managers and directors by their first name as anything else would seem strange and often too formal, but in China you must not call anyone by their first name unless they tell you to or you and they ‘lose face’, you must always preface their last name with their title or position, such as Director or Manager.
Respecting those around you
This is another area where certain formalities come into play. The first that should be noted is that you should not compliment anyone on their level of English; this might be entirely normal in a Western business context but in China it can be seen as insulting that you cannot find anything else to compliment them on or that you are 'surprised' that a Chinese person can speak English. In many European businesses it is quite usual for colleagues to hug, high-five, or even kiss one another on the cheek, this should be completely avoided in China and especially between men and women. Another way of showing respect is to stand up when other people enter the room, although this may be considered to be extremely formal in many business cultures it is to be expected in China and once a meeting or introduction is concluded, you must allow your Chinese colleagues to leave first. Seating arrangements for business meetings will be organised in order of seniority, rather than teams being allowed to sit where they like. It is best to wait and someone will show you to your place, so you do not risk offending anyone in the room.
Business cards in China, as in Japan, are extremely important and should also be handled with respect, it is a good idea to buy a small case to keep cards you are given into as putting it in your wallet can be deemed to be quite rude (remember money and signs of wealth are to be avoided) you must read the name and title on the card, as ignoring it will cause the other person to ‘lose face’ and you will appear disrespectful- graciously accept the card with both hands and when you give out your card, ensure it faces the other person so that they can read it.
Dining etiquette in China
Dining with colleagues is a common occurrence in China and it brings it’s own brand of etiquette. It may be of some surprise that business is not a topic to be discussed at the dinner table, unless you are invited to by the host. As we covered earlier, there are also some topics that should be avoided for risk of offending the guests, such as politics, death, wealth, and cultural history. Normally, the person inviting people to eat (usually the most senior member) will order the dishes, although as an overseas guest you may be given the opportunity to order some for yourself. Once the food arrives, you should not begin eating or drinking before the host, no matter how hungry you are or how long you may have waited. You should make the effort to try a little of everything, and the host will guide you to what he believes are the best dishes. This is a display of his hospitality and prosperity and should always be accepted. Whatever you do, do not gesture with your chopsticks and do not put them upright in a bowl. Rest them over the plate, without pointing them in the air. This can be seen as a symbol of a curse towards your colleagues, or impending death... and that never goes down well at a dinner party.